This past summer I strived to make things more 'fun', 'eventful', and 'memorable' for my children. My boys are teenagers, you see... and I view each day as an opportunity for memory making. I feel that my time with them is coming to an end (as if when they turn 18 I'm not going to have the chance make any more memories). It's silly, I know... but this was my focus of the season the beginning of summer, and I was wanting to make the most of the time that we have together as a family of six.
We went to California to visit family for my grandparent's 65th wedding anniversary celebration. We went to Pacific City, OR for a family reunion, took a trip one Saturday to the Bite of Seattle, and rented a cabin on Camano Island for a weekend getaway, among various local activities and events. I FELT ACCOMPLISHED.
Once fall was approaching, I took a moment with my boys, and asked them how they felt about the summer and all the 'fun' we had. I was excited about their response and was somewhat hoping for lots of reminiscing on how this was the best summer EVER! and thought maybe I would get a little kudo or two. Their response was unexpected, "It was tooo BUSY!"
UGH. I suddenly realized that I was the mom I never wanted to be. The mom who overschedules her children.
I now realize that I had succumbed to society's idea of what should be done within a summertime- families should go on vacation. Families should site see. Families should spend LOTS of money in one day at an adventure park, and families must support their local major league sports teams by cheering them on from the stands and buying $5 hotdogs. Mothers should have something exciting to say to other mothers when asked "What did you 'do' this summer?" Shouldn't they?
So I'm going back to my old way of doing things... letting kids be kids... hanging out with friends, going on walks, playing games, eating dinner outside, riding bikes to 7-11 for slurpies, rolling in the grass, wiffle ball tournaments and movie nights. I used to do these things because I'm cheap and most of them are free... but now I realize the true value of them.
Thank you, boys, for being honest with me and not saying what you thought I wanted to hear.
3 comments:
The beauty of this journey of motherhood is realizing the precious gift of the simple moments...
Great post cuz'
~Sheri
I agree. The only thing Madison says she likes and missed this summer was going camping out at the coast. Could have cared less about driving cross country to visit family and sight see on the way home (ok not our original plan for he summer either but..) a normal summer she wants to spend the night with grandparents, have play dates, go to the beach and camp in a tent, and to be able to roast marshmellows and that is the best time for her. :) Which for me is great because it is a lot easier on the pocket book and a lot more family time then running around trying to do so much.
PS Will remember this as she gets older too :)
I think being a parent is by trial and error. Relationship and being with your family is the greatest gift you can give one another. I am glad Dara told me about your blog.
Ours is at freedomtrainministries.com - take a look too.
Blessings, Marilyn
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